What is it about university or at university that you worry about or is very difficult?
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Wednesday, 10 November 2010
From College to University
College = stay at home, go to school nearby, happy and safe environment where everyone knows you.
University = far from home, scary new place, nobody knows you and far too much socialising.
WRONG!
University is a scary process but only if you let it be. Get rid of those fears by visiting the university before you go and make sure you look at the accommodation.
Also open days are a great time to meet your lecturers, see where you will have lessons and time to ask all those questions about the course before you go. There will also be accommodation there to see and ask questions about and the disability department will be around too just waiting for you. (I even got an email from one university officer introducing herself and asking to see me before I even went!)
So now you know about your course, your support and your accommodation! Finance will also be around too so money worried are covered, but that still doesn’t get rid of all those fears.
You still have to leave home (providing you don’t live nearby or commute) and packing is a little stressful but you can always ask your family or friends to bring things up for you and that list you’ve revised 5 times covers pretty much everything.
When you get to university you don’t have to go out drinking all the time or even spend loads of time with other people. There are loads of people at university who don’t drink or spend their lives socialising so you’re not alone!
Any worries or problems do not mean everything is over and time to go home! The disability department will be there for you and can help you work through any small issues. It’s just like being at school again (without all the home bells and uniform) and you survived that!
Just because you have autism doesn’t mean you cannot go to university and there are rules even laws there to protect you. Just stick to what you want to do!
University = far from home, scary new place, nobody knows you and far too much socialising.
WRONG!
University is a scary process but only if you let it be. Get rid of those fears by visiting the university before you go and make sure you look at the accommodation.
Also open days are a great time to meet your lecturers, see where you will have lessons and time to ask all those questions about the course before you go. There will also be accommodation there to see and ask questions about and the disability department will be around too just waiting for you. (I even got an email from one university officer introducing herself and asking to see me before I even went!)
So now you know about your course, your support and your accommodation! Finance will also be around too so money worried are covered, but that still doesn’t get rid of all those fears.
You still have to leave home (providing you don’t live nearby or commute) and packing is a little stressful but you can always ask your family or friends to bring things up for you and that list you’ve revised 5 times covers pretty much everything.
When you get to university you don’t have to go out drinking all the time or even spend loads of time with other people. There are loads of people at university who don’t drink or spend their lives socialising so you’re not alone!
Any worries or problems do not mean everything is over and time to go home! The disability department will be there for you and can help you work through any small issues. It’s just like being at school again (without all the home bells and uniform) and you survived that!
Just because you have autism doesn’t mean you cannot go to university and there are rules even laws there to protect you. Just stick to what you want to do!
Moving into a New House
You’ve stayed in halls for a year and now you’re looking for a place to stay. I wouldn’t stay in halls all the time because they can throw you out at a moment’s notice and are usually more expensive than renting privately.
Researching on the internet is the best way to go. Sites like www.spareroom.co.uk, www.rightmove.co.uk, www.accommodationforstudents.com or www.homesforstudents.co.uk are where to look.
Sign up and search for homes in your area. Always visit the property before renting and find out everything from rent, monthly fuel costs, bonds and reservation fees and take a really good look at every room in the property (garden included). Arriving early is a good plan because then you can see what the surrounding area is like too.
If you like the place find out when you can move in, how long the landlord is letting for and anything about other housemates if you don’t know them already.
Remember, you don’t have to form a group to fit the house. Single room rent is also available so don’t just try to find anyone to live with.
Packing and moving, well, I always have a plan (like all of us with autism) and I pack what I’m going to need first and make sure that I take those boxes to the house and start unpacking before I get the rest (if that is possible).
Things like decorations, books, clothing and what can go under the bed are easiest to put away then everything else just fits around that.
Try to unpack as much as possible but if it’s getting too much don’t be afraid to take some time out and take a look at the area, you never know what short cuts you might find.
Researching on the internet is the best way to go. Sites like www.spareroom.co.uk, www.rightmove.co.uk, www.accommodationforstudents.com or www.homesforstudents.co.uk are where to look.
Sign up and search for homes in your area. Always visit the property before renting and find out everything from rent, monthly fuel costs, bonds and reservation fees and take a really good look at every room in the property (garden included). Arriving early is a good plan because then you can see what the surrounding area is like too.
If you like the place find out when you can move in, how long the landlord is letting for and anything about other housemates if you don’t know them already.
Remember, you don’t have to form a group to fit the house. Single room rent is also available so don’t just try to find anyone to live with.
Packing and moving, well, I always have a plan (like all of us with autism) and I pack what I’m going to need first and make sure that I take those boxes to the house and start unpacking before I get the rest (if that is possible).
Things like decorations, books, clothing and what can go under the bed are easiest to put away then everything else just fits around that.
Try to unpack as much as possible but if it’s getting too much don’t be afraid to take some time out and take a look at the area, you never know what short cuts you might find.
Are You STALKING!?!?
One of the biggest problems we all find with have autism is not knowing social boundaries or recognising body language.
So far you have been told not to keep butting into conversations, not to stand too close to someone, make eye contact once in a while but now you’ve been accused of stalking!
This is very hard to take in especially when texting, making calls even writing emails worry you because of past experiences of people when contacting them. It’s always been better face to face or to avoid them altogether so how are you a stalker?
Someone you know and get along with, even see regularly, gives you their email or mobile and insist you send them a message and this frightens you but you know this person so sending that message won’t make them hate you?
They reply and everything seems fine but you only contact them when they’ve told you to or, in an emergency, if someone else said you should be ok to contact them.
Of course you still prefer face to face so go to talk to them quickly but since they’re busy you wait until they have finished and then try to catch them, you don’t want them hating you for butting into their conversation.
Suddenly there’s a complaint that you are stalking them and this doesn’t make sense! They say you are waiting for them a lot, texting them too much and are worried that you are going to follow them home!
It makes no sense and you feel like a monster, staying away from them so they don’t feel you are stalking them, but you have lost a friend and you never want to accept anyone’s number again and refuse to wait for people even if they told you to wait for them.
It hurts but you need to tell people!
Contact your disability officer if you can. They can help you sort out what you are going to do from now on and help you recognise when someone thinks you’re stalking them.
Talk to a friend, strange as it may seem not everyone thinks you are stalking them and are fine with the way you contact each other.
If this person is taking legal action then see the Citizens Advice Bureau. It’s a good idea to have someone to get your side across and not to be left to horrible accusations.
Remember, people like their space and there’s no harm checking with them that they’re ok with you but just because someone says you’re a monster doesn’t mean its true!
So far you have been told not to keep butting into conversations, not to stand too close to someone, make eye contact once in a while but now you’ve been accused of stalking!
This is very hard to take in especially when texting, making calls even writing emails worry you because of past experiences of people when contacting them. It’s always been better face to face or to avoid them altogether so how are you a stalker?
Someone you know and get along with, even see regularly, gives you their email or mobile and insist you send them a message and this frightens you but you know this person so sending that message won’t make them hate you?
They reply and everything seems fine but you only contact them when they’ve told you to or, in an emergency, if someone else said you should be ok to contact them.
Of course you still prefer face to face so go to talk to them quickly but since they’re busy you wait until they have finished and then try to catch them, you don’t want them hating you for butting into their conversation.
Suddenly there’s a complaint that you are stalking them and this doesn’t make sense! They say you are waiting for them a lot, texting them too much and are worried that you are going to follow them home!
It makes no sense and you feel like a monster, staying away from them so they don’t feel you are stalking them, but you have lost a friend and you never want to accept anyone’s number again and refuse to wait for people even if they told you to wait for them.
It hurts but you need to tell people!
Contact your disability officer if you can. They can help you sort out what you are going to do from now on and help you recognise when someone thinks you’re stalking them.
Talk to a friend, strange as it may seem not everyone thinks you are stalking them and are fine with the way you contact each other.
If this person is taking legal action then see the Citizens Advice Bureau. It’s a good idea to have someone to get your side across and not to be left to horrible accusations.
Remember, people like their space and there’s no harm checking with them that they’re ok with you but just because someone says you’re a monster doesn’t mean its true!
Monday, 8 November 2010
No course for you!
When you go to university you worry about the accommodation, friends you will or won’t make and what work you need to do for your course. What you don’t worry about is arriving at university, being told that they can’t support you and have to leave your accommodation. You’re given no reason, no support and return home in tears never wanting to return to education again – at least not to another university.
The question is ‘Is this legal?’
NO, this is disability discrimination at its worst unless the university is using a fitness to study policy but even then you can demand the reasons for rejection from any university and those should be given within 10 days!
What happens now? Well you write a complaints letter to the university outlining what has happened and request the reasons for rejection. Both of these should be solved in 10 days. If you are still not happy you can contact several organisations (links page) who can guide you through what you are entitled to, look at the complaint again or even help you take legal action against the university!
The university may be using what they call a duty of care where if they feel the course will cause you mental or physical harm but don’t assume that these fancy phrases mean what they are doing is right! You hold a right to appeal whatever they say and if their decision is causing more mental or physical harm then the chances are they are in the wrong! These procedures are there to protect you not destroy you!
Remember to keep a record of all letters, emails, summary of meetings – these will help you fight your case!
All university rules and procedures should be available on their website and legal information is available at http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/index.htm.
The question is ‘Is this legal?’
NO, this is disability discrimination at its worst unless the university is using a fitness to study policy but even then you can demand the reasons for rejection from any university and those should be given within 10 days!
What happens now? Well you write a complaints letter to the university outlining what has happened and request the reasons for rejection. Both of these should be solved in 10 days. If you are still not happy you can contact several organisations (links page) who can guide you through what you are entitled to, look at the complaint again or even help you take legal action against the university!
The university may be using what they call a duty of care where if they feel the course will cause you mental or physical harm but don’t assume that these fancy phrases mean what they are doing is right! You hold a right to appeal whatever they say and if their decision is causing more mental or physical harm then the chances are they are in the wrong! These procedures are there to protect you not destroy you!
Remember to keep a record of all letters, emails, summary of meetings – these will help you fight your case!
All university rules and procedures should be available on their website and legal information is available at http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/index.htm.
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